Tag Archives: Life

Driving Personalities & Past Life theory

I was not a strong believer in Past Life theories for a long time. At least not since my birth in Present Life.  But things changed.  They changed, after I took my driving test and got behind the wheels on my own.  It was one busy morning in my driving seat and I was speeding on the highway. Atleast for a novice driver like me, 50kmph was like a full throttle charge. And just then I got a Vision. All my fellow drivers on the highway zipping past me, had transformed into some possessed creatures from the animal kingdom. Unfortunately this vision has been haunting me every time I am behind the wheel.

So here is my dreadful list of Past life forms of most of my fellow drivers that I have been encountering everyday.

The Mighty Rat:

This past life species drives with only a singular objective. Find a gap between two cars and encroach that space. They are ready to jeopardize their and others life through every minute of their driving. Some how a large population of Autorickshaw drivers in India fall under this Past life form.

The Zig- zag Cobra: 

Drivers with tendencies of this past life form bear a strong resemblance with ‘The Mighty Rat’. Yet one of the biggest difference being the speed at which the Cobra souls drive their bodies. Lethal in attack and also unfortunately with may be the highest mortality rates in Present Life.

The Sleepy Snail:  This Past Life form has actually absolute disregard for any laws of motion, but still adheres to the 1st law of motion- If an object experiences no net force, then its velocity is constant: the object is either at rest (if its velocity is zero), or it moves in a straight line with constant speed (if its velocity is nonzero).  They also prefer to defy laws of time and space.

The Scorpion King:

Empty road or crowded roads, these  Past Life souls prefer to drive their vehicles crossways. They may not be always fast,but straight road is not for them. Somehow they also display a higher degree of vengeance to fellow creatures  on the road and are abusive like their Rat and Cobra counterparts. No one escapes a sting by the Scorpion King.

The Gentle Horse:

This one is the safest Past Life species to befriend, atleast for me. They mend their own way, gentle yet assertive on the lane.  Traffic or no traffic, these gentle souls do not fret. For them, life is journey. Destination and time to destination is secondary. Safety and pleasure of the ride are some past life instincts of this genre. Interestingly, in  Present Life this species has demonstrated longer life span.

The Raging Bull:

This one seems to be the most dreadful of the all the Past Life forms to me. With their dark evil shadows looming over me all the time, they cannot stop honking their ‘Horns’ ! I have almost got mowed down by them, thanks to my single lane driving instincts.

My dreadful visions have not stopped yet; I am anxious that more species might get discovered. Do feel free to report any new findings.

And yes, no matter who you were in your past life, Wish you SAFE DRIVING 🙂

No Shave, No Lipstick…the new dating mantra

Not sure how many of you have noticed the ongoing “No Shave, No Lipstick” movement in the media. Well it’s actually a daring ad campaign smartly tagged as ‘Movement’ for the new Gillette shaving blades.

Well,  to decode the ‘Movement’ as stated in the advertorial, it’s all about how women consider men to be undesirable, uncool and as per some extreme comments less trustworthy, if they are with a stubble!

And all this research by AC Nielsen with a record-breaking massive sample set of 150 women in few metros! That’s it..well that’s why it’s called a Sample set.

This is a dreadful statistics for all the Lipstick companies. Behind every unshaven man, there will the one or may be many (could vary in some case I believe) women; who are committed not to use their most preferred  weapon from their vanity box, the Lipstick.

Thank god that I am married by now. So no imminent threat with my weekend stubble.  But yes, for all the bachelor men out there, you better take this seriously.

Looking forward to some FB posts as follows.

Chulbul Pandey added an update to March 25, 2012 on his  timeline – Clean shaven today

   Shiela, Munni and 5 others like this.

Shiela Chulbul Pandey, let’s go for a coffee today. What say ?

Cheers

Mandar

Seven types of Air Travelers

Flying can be fun, if you enjoy observing people. Every-time I fly, I somehow pigeon-hole fellow passengers in one of my prejudiced slots. I get amused by the way each of these kinds behave.  Here is my express list of air travelers these days.

The Pyjama Party Hoppers

Well this cool dude will be comfortable surfing in his pyjamas or shorts and slip ons all over the place.  For him, the Goan beach or an airport lounge, life is always a party.  Well and you know this saves him lot of time while he dashes from one city to another. With ruffled hair and droopy eyes, a lot of time I get a feeling that these people are innocent sleep walkers who have lost their way to the airport lounge.  May be next time I will be the good Samaritan to help him back to his shack.

Miss Louis Vuitton

Madam LVMH is all set to capture the eyeballs on this mega event called Flying. Ever before you spot her in the crowd, her, strong if not always mesmerizing perfume makes her presence felt. And even before you could see her,  a lot many times you get nudged by her entourage of vanity bags and boxes.  Maintaining a minimal eye contact with most menial people around  (thanks to those Big  Versace sunglasses) , she ensures that her business comes first. A lot of time she is the most dreadful passenger for the ground staff and the in-flight crew to handle, for her business always come first !

Mr. Gadget Freak

Mr. Apps is so fully loaded with his gizmos, that all the security checkpoints he gets alarms buzzing.  Minute after minute he keeps juggling between his gizmo inventory. The ‘ipod’ is his constant adaptation, may be the one he uses is even water proof, so that he is never without one. Suddenly you will see him bobbing his head to some trance music may be paying homage to Mr.Jobs. By the time he settles down in the waiting lounge, up comes the ‘ipad’.  In the mid-air just when all the cabin lights are dimmed, pop goes his overhead light and out comes his ‘Kindle’. Mr.Gadget freak always reminds me of the ‘Salesmen’ we spot on local trains in Mumbai. Have your ever noticed how easily they keep fishing out their wares in the crowded trains for eager buyers. Mesmerizing ! Finally Mr Gizmo switches to his “PSP”. Once I almost got knocked off when one Gadget guru was racing on his ‘PSP’. Well life is a ‘Game’ isn’t it ?

The Workaholic

This kind gets his inspiration from Mr.Gadget freak; the only difference being, for him life is “all work and no play”. He is normally the last one to board the flight. A business suit in one hand, an open laptop flap in another and in between dangles part of his luggage. By the time the safety announcement requests’ passengers to switch off all electronic devices, Mr.Workaholic is still on his blackberry closing the mother of all mortgage deals in some part of the world. After repeated requests he will finally pretends to shut down his devices. He incidentally believe that safety comes first. The moment the seat belt sign is put off,  he frantically dangles and leaps over the overhead compartment to grab his laptop. From now on till the aircraft prepares to land, he is the only visibly awake passenger on the flight. The pilots these days I understand feel it safer to be on auto-pilot!

The Big Momma

Well I pity this woman for being in charge to manage a mischievous and handful pre-schooler and a whining infant junior part II. She is all geared for this dreadful flight. One back pack, one sling bag and multiple trolley bags, which seem to have missed the ‘laws of motion’ she is one of the last people to enter the aircraft. I can’t blame her. Her back pack has all the ration to keep the two kids in good spirits. Starting with some Choco snack  bars, gums, juice tetra packs, sandwiches, biscuits, milk foods for the infant, diapers, toys just all. Phew may be much more. Airport assistance or no assistance, she is a woman on mission.

The First Time Flyer (FTF)

We all have been through this stage. Been through those awkward moments when you do not know what to do. For this gentleman it’s not as much the joy of flying but the list of don’ts that he keeps memorizing. He is a butt of all the suspicion for the security personnel. His nervousness about flying gives him a hue of a shady criminal unsure of his business. His luggage accessories have yet not been upgraded for the air travel. A trunk or a large suitcase always add to his awkwardness. But well one can’t blame him for that. That’s the first time he is flying. From getting into wrong boarding queues to getting on the wrong aircraft, this kind is always at its wits to brace up. Once airborne, they keep jutting out of their seats to look outside the window. And yes some do not refrain from calling the pretty air hostess “Madam”.

Mr.Snooz…

Mr.Snooz, is always snoozing. From later arrival to the airport to catching a wink at the waiting lounge, he is always at peace with his surroundings. Nothing can stop him from catching wink in busy places. He also at times is the last passenger on board. Some of them snore loud enough to make propellers shudder. I strongly feel this set of passengers can cause interruptions with radio waves and all possible communication of the pilot with the Air Traffic Controller (ATC).  Well this may not have been proved in the popular series of “Aircraft Crash Investigations”, but there could be a case for my theory ! Anyone wants to second me on this one ?

Note : This post has gender specific references. You could liberally change the usage if you consider it appropriate 🙂 No offence to any gender intended.

Kids & Pets

Shanaia, our 3 and half year old daughter cheekily asked, “Mama Can we buy a Dog ?”  Mama asked why? And she promptly answered,  “dogs can catch robbers.” Mama replied with a stern no. Try number two. “Then can we buy a Cat?”  Again a big no from Mama. Then may be a parrot. Mama’s “no” were as prompt as the questions.

How about Fishes?  This one, Shanaia won with 4-3 . Shanaia had smartly calculated, Fishes were one thing mama definitely loves;  if not alive, definitely dead. And that’s when Shanaia knew she had a sealed  her first deal, a Pet.

And I was more than eager to ensure to get a fish tank. I had similar conversations with my mom as  child.  After a long stint of negotiations I was reluctantly allowed to have a fish tank. Graduating from a fish tank I managed to convince my parents to get me a pair of ‘Love birds’. Seeing my passion for pets, one of my uncles had gifted me a pair of ‘Turtles’. And finally for a brief period I had kept  ‘White mice’.

By the time Shanaia, grandpa & me were at the pet shop, ‘the child in me’  was revisiting all the special memories I had with all my pets. Growing up with pets was an important experience that I had imbibed.  It had inculcated in me a sense of responsibility, love, care, respect for all living beings. The pain & remorse of losing my fishes & love birds prepared me for harsher realities of life as a child, ‘we all are mortals’.

And now while my daughter is growing up, I would love her to grow with her pets .

Yet there are a few important considerations that one needs to keep in mind before buying pets.

  1. Like the amount of time you or your child and spend to take care in maintaining pets in a responsible way.
  2. Pets of different kinds are prone to catch infections and also pass it on to humans or in some case trigger pre existing allergies.
  3. Do a fair amount of research before buying any pet. From traits, care, breed, to knowing where you are going to place the pets in your house.

College Beat

It all started in an admission queue,

When you were alone in a world that was new.

You were scared and anxious,

But determined to make a new beginning and quite curious.

You came across a person, interesting who seemed,

Who made you comfortable and you regained your self-esteem.

Bullied by the peons, and ragged by the seniors,

You felt very embarrassed, and made to feel inferior.

But soon, you made new friends ,

and a group was formed to set new trends.

As  a regular bunker to a default defaulter,

You topped the charts as a black lister.

From college canteen, to outside gutter,

It was your empire shabby no matter.

Then came the first friendship day,

With a number of friendship bands with you at the end of the day.

After a lots of crushes,

And your dreams reduced to ashes.

One fine day you found a soul mate,

And tried hard with all your might, knowing not what was in fate.

And days passed by and so did years,

You could not believe it was the end of your five years.

A time to say goodbye to your old buddies.

And slog pretty harder with your studies.

A time to farewell the bygone days of share and care,

And step into the mean world with a dare.

A time to ponder upon your memories,

And make every attempt to cherish.

But departing won’t part our souls,

Our times together shall unit our souls.

This poem was written in 1999. Now when I look back, it still brings back some fond memories during the college days.

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>Open Books

Every day I walk down the street, busy people gliding on their feet.

Hundreds of faces passing by, heading to destinations, you would wonder where?

One look into theie eyes & you can see, lost souls in deep thoughts, deeper than the sea.

Mark has a job to find, just a carrier break that’s on his mind.

Alan has a loan to pay, bigger than his pockets can weigh.

Don’t you see what I see, people are open books I can read.

Shetal has a picture of a guy in her eyes, one she loves but cannot stand his lies.

Jim is hoping for a raise, praying someone appreciates his work and utters a raise.

Don’t you see what I see, people are open books I can read.

Reena has got divorce papers to file, to get rid of her cheating husband, and go away in exile.

Jerry just had an HIV test, doc says, sixty days and he may rest.

Don’t you see what I see, people are open books I can read.

Ralph has dirty money in his pants, a place to blow up is all that he wants.

Raj  is waiting for his pension to come, cause his kids are saying dad we are done.

Don’t you see what I see, people are open books I can read.

At the corner of the street poor Child is craving for just a roti,

With hunger in his eyes, he is  afraid he may never see the dawn again.

Don’t you see what I see, people are open books I can read.

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