Tag Archives: Parenting

Kids & Pets

Shanaia, our 3 and half year old daughter cheekily asked, “Mama Can we buy a Dog ?”  Mama asked why? And she promptly answered,  “dogs can catch robbers.” Mama replied with a stern no. Try number two. “Then can we buy a Cat?”  Again a big no from Mama. Then may be a parrot. Mama’s “no” were as prompt as the questions.

How about Fishes?  This one, Shanaia won with 4-3 . Shanaia had smartly calculated, Fishes were one thing mama definitely loves;  if not alive, definitely dead. And that’s when Shanaia knew she had a sealed  her first deal, a Pet.

And I was more than eager to ensure to get a fish tank. I had similar conversations with my mom as  child.  After a long stint of negotiations I was reluctantly allowed to have a fish tank. Graduating from a fish tank I managed to convince my parents to get me a pair of ‘Love birds’. Seeing my passion for pets, one of my uncles had gifted me a pair of ‘Turtles’. And finally for a brief period I had kept  ‘White mice’.

By the time Shanaia, grandpa & me were at the pet shop, ‘the child in me’  was revisiting all the special memories I had with all my pets. Growing up with pets was an important experience that I had imbibed.  It had inculcated in me a sense of responsibility, love, care, respect for all living beings. The pain & remorse of losing my fishes & love birds prepared me for harsher realities of life as a child, ‘we all are mortals’.

And now while my daughter is growing up, I would love her to grow with her pets .

Yet there are a few important considerations that one needs to keep in mind before buying pets.

  1. Like the amount of time you or your child and spend to take care in maintaining pets in a responsible way.
  2. Pets of different kinds are prone to catch infections and also pass it on to humans or in some case trigger pre existing allergies.
  3. Do a fair amount of research before buying any pet. From traits, care, breed, to knowing where you are going to place the pets in your house.

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>Honey I cloned the kids!

>Do we regard our children as an extension of ourselves? Just the way our clothes, homes, cars and gadgets have become an extension of ourselves. Just mere an expression of our status to the world.

Do we fail to recognize or appreciate the unique individuality of our children? An insane way of self absorption, wherein we are oblivious to their identify and blossom into what they dream to be. And yet expect then to succeed in their lives, well as per our expectations, our unfulfilled and dreams, fantasies; that were clipped in the bud in our childhood.

To love our children is to know the pain of separateness. But we don’t dare to endure the pain. Not because we as parents cannot bear it now, but we rarely were conditioned to bear it in our young days. Separateness is physical as well as in thoughts. Sameness brings forth comfort, mitigates fear of isolation.

And while we are relentless in taming our children to adopt our traits, likes, aspirations, fears, they may or may adopt our thoughts and ways; sure enough they will learn how to make replicas of their own self.

Mandar Karnik

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(Excerpt : The road less traveled_M.Scott Peck)

Your children are not your children.

They are the sons and daughters of the Life’s longing for itself.

They come through you but not from you,

And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,

For they have their own thoughts.

You may house their bodies but not their souls,

For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You my strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.

For life goes not backward not tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.

The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrow may go swift and far.

Let your bending in the archers’s hand be for gladness;

For even He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the blow that is stable.